Electronic Simplicity

I enjoy video games - simple ones. No crazy shoot-shoot. I do not want to build anything. I do not want to create a society, or world. And I certainly do not want to deal with any sort of wizardry.
This is why I am a lover of regular Nintendo. It is best, for a simple man such as myself. Their are only two red buttons, and the lowercase "t". This is acceptable.
Some games of note are; Super Mario Brothers and RBI baseball. These two games have the following in common;
- I would play them, rather than going outdoors on most occasions
- I have cursed violently many times, at their expense.
- I can play them for hours on end - especially when engaging in specific "intoxicants"
- If there was only one copy left on earth of each, and it was promised to me by the Emperor of the Universe, only upon my completion of a challenging quest, I would undoubtedly go on said quest, and champion it.
- In turn, I would live my days in a palace in the sky, playing the games on a majestic, jewel encrusted television, whilst eating an endless supply of Grilled Cheese Sandwiches. I would have a medium sized Hippo as a companion.

Goodness, pigs certainly do fly!

But yes; perhaps this simplicity is troubling? Is this realization of my lust for simplicity, then, a covert way of my brain telling me that it is feeble? Is this my brain saying;

"Sorry Ian, it is because I am not very good a thinking things alot, especsh' when they are hard. Keep it simple for me. Also - you should buy some prosciutto deli meat asap. We like that, and you never buy it."

Shut your goddamned mouth brain! So this is why I suck a calculus, eh! You rotten fleshy bastard!

Oh well, I suppose it is best to cope with the realization the only way I know how; by playing simple video games for hours.

Er... wait?

Mr. Bacon Wag